The Barracuda Mouth

Roll on into the Barracuda Mouth, where you’ll be spoon fed, strip searched, and by God you will get the cure for what ails. Welcome! We’re glad you’re here.

Yes, here it is, the Barracuda Mouth – come as you are and leave even better. Ask what you want, what can’t we give? Ice cubes in milk, propellers on bicycles, fire in the hole and hair on your chest – all’s fair in love, war, and the Barracuda Mouth. No stupid questions, no wrong answers, no lonely nights. No pain.

Listen to what the people are saying.

“Whatever you’re looking for, the Barracuda Mouth is it.”
-Dr. Steve Speller - St Paul, MN.

“I’ve been around for a long time, and I’ve never seen anything as good as the Barracuda Mouth.”
-Chev Chancellor, Chicago, IL


“I am the Barracuda Mouth.”
-God


Wave your dirty laundry like the national flag. Show off the chinks in your armor like medals of honor and make love to the skeletons in your closet. At the Barracuda Mouth, your fallen angels will kick off their heels on dance on pianos. Ask what you want. What can’t we give?

We’ve got banjos, baritones, saxophones, telephones, dirt roads, army clothes, halfway homes, lawn gnomes, funny bones, cyclones, horn toads, afros, hobos, tacos, and the world’s largest freestanding fence post! That’s the Barracuda Mouth guarantee, and our word is our bond is our blood.

It’s the place to be, the hot spot, the sensation sweeping the nation. What’s behind doors numbers one through three, at the end of the rainbow, and behind the music. It’s the fountain of whatever you like. It’s where you never grow old. Its flame burns eternal. Drink and never thirst again.

So, next time you’re looking for a good time, the Barracuda Mouth is your one-stop, never-go-again destination. Don’t forget, Tuesday nights is karaoke nights.